She gets into a relationship with this guy and she says, “Great, this is the type of guy I wanted and now I have him.” So on some level, she feels she has something of value just by virtue of having (or potentially having) a relationship with this type of guy that she values instead of solely evaluating the relationship on how it feels in the moment to moment interaction with the guy when they’re together.
So things start out and she’s delighted to be with this guy that has the quality (or multiple qualities) she wanted…
Most of the time it is some conflict or harsh criticism from your partner that you didn’t provoke or even think could be interpreted negatively in the first place.
In your mind, you’re thinking, “Things were so good… this is just a misunderstanding.” So you try your best to defuse the situation and get off of it. but then, more and more, you notice that the conflicts keep coming up (without provocation on your part) and more and more their comments to you are peppered with insults, put downs or diminishments of things you value or enjoy.
Your relationship with this person might be making your life a living nightmare at the moment…
By comfort, I mean that it is the life you’ve grown accustomed to and, while you’re not happy with this relationship, you feel that your life might be even worse than it is now if you rock the boat.
He’s always been faithful to me, he pays all my bills and we live together now.
Toxic relationships are tricky because they’re never clear, black-and-white cases of things being “bad”.
He was attentive, sweet, caring and I felt on top of the world with him.I’m afraid to say or do the wrong thing around him because I never know what will trigger his anger or harsh criticism.On the other hand, though, when things are good, they’re really good.Now, after 2 years into the relationship, I’m starting to question if I’m in a toxic relationship.I have felt for a long time that I have to walk on eggshells around him…
He was attentive, sweet, caring and I felt on top of the world with him.
I’m afraid to say or do the wrong thing around him because I never know what will trigger his anger or harsh criticism.
On the other hand, though, when things are good, they’re really good.
Now, after 2 years into the relationship, I’m starting to question if I’m in a toxic relationship.
I have felt for a long time that I have to walk on eggshells around him…
a person could have a toxic relationship with a friend, co-worker or even a family member.